Happy Go Lucky

I faked my friends death

because I couldn’t fake my own

and I asked her how much I should give 

while I checked my reflection in the rearview mirror

and she said

you give and you give until you can’t give anymore

give and you give until you can’t give anymore

then you inhale a moment for yourself

and then you blow that away

It didn’t hit me until the second night

that I was alone, I was alright

sleeping in the airport

washing in the bathroom

sink sink sink until you swim

how could I lie to them?

what the hell is wrong with me?

Mirror, what is wrong with me?

Dear, what is wrong with me?

I’m fucking done with me.

I watched the sunrise from a train

I met a girl who tried to sell me cocaine

But I didn’t have anywhere to go

So I had to tell her no

and I went out to the bay

To waste another day

Blinded by sunrays

I’ve got nothing new to say

But I’ll say it anyway

in all this poetry

but it ain’t helping me

and if it ain’t helping me

it’s gone

I’m sorry, I’m sorry

I don’t know what got into me

I was a child, I was free

I was a good one, I was happy

Go lucky. 

But now I’m me.

I’m me.